“I am going to take this bucket of water and pour it on the flames of hell, and then I am going to use this torch to burn down the gates of paradise so that people will not love God for want of heaven or fear of hell, but because He is God.”
People are always annoyed by learning institutes, be it a school or college or university, people are constantly complaining about life conquered by exam oriented systems: a pile of assignments with a dash of nerve wrecking exams to study for. So when the times comes for a holiday, a break from this so-called prison, we literally...go nuts.
Going to sleep before the break of dawn, waking up after lunch time, spending almost 24 hours in front of the computer, hangout with friends, eat all day, sleep all day, and that's the whole routine for the holiday. Don't kid yourself with the thought of doing homework or studying for the next semester, read my lips "That. Will never happen". Everyday is a useless cycle.
I got to be honest, I like school. I was in denial before, but I've come to my senses and embraced the ironic fact that I love school. I just love it. It's the only period where I feel..like I have a life. Being bound with schedules means a life to me, like I have a purpose to wake up and breathe. Today I'm gonna do this, tomorrow I'm gonna do that. I learn things and I have a light pressure to be serious about it and to actually pin it to my brain. I don't feel worthless to live. When I actually wake up to get ready for classes, I finally get to enjoy the morning breeze, I feel alive.
Being back to classes and exams relaxes me, a lot. I feel relief, like everything's going to be normal again. I'm honestly, really excited to be learning again.
It's not that I don't trust him, I just....doubt him. Dia jenis persistent, kalau benda tu dia nak, dia nak jugak, kalau tak dapat terus mengamuk, but that doesn't make him a jerk in general, he just doesn't seem to understand yet how to control his desires, jadi berdasarkan teori aku ni, aku takleh strict sangat dengan dia, aku tak nak kongkong hidup dia, lagi rebel jadinya. So aku lenient.
Tapi risaulah jugak bila keluar malam-malam, curfew dia sampai Maghrib, takleh lebih-lebih, tapi bila hala tujunya ke Surau, susah sikit nak halang, yelah pergi tempat baik, masalahnya buat benda baik ke tak? Keraguan tu wujudlah bila denga laporan-laporan Maryam pasal dia mingle dengan delinquents, time orang ceramah dia main kat padang, and worse he's been lying. Tambah pulak Suedah cakap sekarang musim orang culik boys his age, makin risau dan makin liar imaginasi possible outcome nanti.
Ninja time. The plan was to go after Maghrib, spy on him, Isya' at surau and then go home like nothing happened, sampai je surau terus cari tempat jauh-jauh dan tersorok nak parking, tapi menghadap pagar masuk, elok je tutup engine, terus nampak Ahmad keluar dengan basikal dia, kalut terus, "IKUT DIA, IKUT DIA!" tapi nak spy orang kena slow-slow, kena smooth, jalan skit, parking dekat bawah pokok, nak tengok dia belok kanan ke kiri, ikut punya ikut, rupanya siggah rumah kawan sekejap pastu balik Surau.
Slack nya plan ni, sebab tak ada lelaki, kalau ada at least one guy, boleh dia access tempat sembahyang Muslimin tengok Ahmad ada tak dalam tu, susah-susah Maryam nak ngintai di sebalik kereta-kereta orang dengan penuh semangatnya tunduk dan menyorok. Haish, kalau orang nampak ni, suspicious benor.
Turns out, Ahmad really did go to the surau, really did listen throughout the ceramah, and really did come home after Isya'. Now I feel ashamed for doubting him in the first place, but still, I'm responsible for him so I deserve to doubt him (more or less), but going ninja was loads of fun with the suspense and stuff. There probably would be a 'next time' :D
Semalam pergi Jalan TAR. Masuk Medan MARA, beli kamera.
Pertama kalinya membeli sesuatu yang berharga lebih dari seribu, dengan duit kumpul sendiri. Gabungan perasaan seronok dan bertanggungjawab pada ketika yang sama.
Kamera itu lawa. Olympus E-PL1, bukanlah DSLR tapi bukanlah juga Compact Camera, sebaliknya, ia gabungan kedua-duanya. A simplified DSLR with the weight of a compact camera, dan berbadankan kamera analog: mini SLR. Aku bukanlah Professional Photographer yang memerlukan kamera besar gedabak dan pelbagai lens yang tiduk kurang juga mahalnya. Tetapi aku menggunakan sebilangan fungsi DSLR yang membuatkan aku gemar memegang DSLR, namun fungsi-fungsi tersebut telah disimplifikasikan ke dalam badan kamera ini yang membuatkannya lebih mudah dibawa kemana sahaja bersama fungsi-fungsi sebuah DSLR tanpa beban berat dan beban takut calar atas dasar kemahalannya yang hampir mencecah batas.
Pergi Masjid Jalan Duta, nak sembahyang Zohor, snapped a few pictures, they were awesome. Niat memang nak upload, tapi sesungguhnya kamera tersebut telah selamat dipack bersama-sama barangan yang lain untuk diangkut ker UIA.
Seseungguhnya, pendaftaran masuk UIA berlangsung dalam lebih kurang 3 jam lagi. Dan aku masih mampu online.
